MID-LIFE WEAVING
I am a self-taught clothesmaker. While my mom taught me sewing skills, how to find a pattern in the fabric store as well as how to mash those patterns together to get the look that I wanted, the way that I make clothes is completely and stubbornly my own creative process. It is simultaneously freeing and limiting.
I’ve had speaking gigs in fashion schools and it’s a rare student who come out with a unique style - a voice of their own. I think I may have been afraid to take classes for fear that it would box me in to some prescribed standard. Please note the aforementioned “stubborn.”
But I confess that my sewing and patterning skills are limited. Immaculate tailoring enchants me. But is it my style of creation? I tell myself “no” and I wholeheartedly detest the process of highly detailed sewing and cutting. It makes me feel like a robot in part of a factory machine. But is it possible that I’m lying to myself simply because I don’t know how to do it?
Red Ink Studios - San Francisco 2005
Weaving my models together - Breakaholics Fashion Show
San Francisco circa 2009ish
In the year of my turning 50 (really? I have to do the math again) I may be less recklessly exciting than I used to be, but there is an emerging sense of deeper self, wisdom and peace. It’s a more adult version of not giving a fuck. In this year, after decades of dipping my toes, I am learning to weave.
If I were to look at my life, time, energy and finances I would think it was the WORST time to take on a new endeavor. So I suppose I’m still a little reckless!
I considered my typical m.o. of buying the equipment and figuring it out myself. But I’m a sensible wise adult now so instead of that, I’m consciously accepting that I need to learn the proper skills in order to break the rules later. I have found a teacher and started the class. And I actually have bought a loom but only on her advice.
In class I’m often tempted to jump to the next step, not bother the teacher while she’s with another student, thinking “I can figure it out.” I reaped the rewards of a tangled near-fatal error with that tactic on Day 1.
Patience and precision are not strong qualities in me, especially with creative endeavors. I am learning, with a lot of slow deep breaths, to honor the precision that I detest in sewing tailored garments.
I am growing.
I am learning.
I am practicing.
I am loving it.
